Psycho MuthaCam Photoshooter Hits Local Produce Market [Part I]

Part I - Unidentified Produce Objects, or What In Your Organic World Might This Be Called? [we'll save, '& how do you eat it?' for another time.] It appears that in organic markets one must already know what items are, as I found NO signs except price-per-pound. And a scale marked 'Weight is Estimate Only.' Perfect example of what the HECK is this? Amoeba A La Produce? E.T.'s fingertips (& hairy knuckles)? Produce Spermatozoa (did I say that)? Hmm, and what have we here? Very technicolor. This looks like an outtake from War of the Worlds. I fear for my dreams tonight. Is this chard?

If you can identify any or all of the above, please leave a comment. Until then, I'll be scared. Very, very scared!