Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Reflection - Follow Up

I think I'm in love. That five minutes I promised myself last night for mirror-gazing turned into 10, then 15. What a slow dance with visual and memory input! What fun! I alternately smiled, frowned, pouted, then blew myself kisses, just to see what those expressions looked like. I remembered I have dimples. I discovered one errant curly eyebrow in my right eyebrow, and I left it there too! My eyes are almond shaped, with a dark-deep blue outer ring, and a gradually lightening baby blue going in toward my pupil. There are gold flecks in my otherwise very blond eyelashes. I have a chip in a lower tooth I didn't know was there, although my tongue did cuz it's always pressing into the wee little gap. I have fabulous sorta Scandinavian cheekbones, which Double BB has commented on since the day I met him but which I had ceased noticing. My hair is a much darker blond than how I usually picture it ... almost brown, although I did recently color it, some 'sandstone' color out of a box, so I'm not sure what's really what with that. I practiced raising and lowering my left eyebrow for myself -- VERY cool, can look alternately sassy or sarcastic. I know I use it both ways, too, but now I know what I look like doing it! I have little ears and they lay flat. My nose is almost but not quite my Grandpa Andy's nose, a nose I adored on a face I adored so I'm quite proud of that. When I look into my own eyes, I see -- first of all my Dad, because his eyes are a similar color, but I 'FEEL' (inside) the expressions I watch cross my Mom's face all the time. When I laugh, then my eyes remind me of all three of my brothers'. The best compliment I've ever received, delivered to me by a very sad man I'd dated but mostly been friends with, as he was departing, permanently, to live in the South: 'I could pick you out of a line of a million women, even if all your faces were covered except for the eyes. You are alive in your eyes. Nobody has eyes as expressive as yours.' Can you imagine? wow. I still get goose bumps remembering that. I do have a few wrinkles starting to take up permanent residence here and there, but you know? I really like them because they're smile lines. I want LOTS of those, no Botox for this babe.

I think once a week, after I take off my make-up, I'm going to have a bonding moment with myself, in the mirror. After, I felt utterly refreshed, enlightened too, and just -- happy! I liked what I saw, very very much! I liked all the family resemblances, the signs of experience/life mapping themselves out on my features and the impish light that never seemed to leave my eyes themselves. And most of all I liked the friendliness I saw in my own face!


Veronica Rosenshein said...

WOW, I wish I could do that but when I look in the mirror I so see my mother and well, you know the story there so I really don't like looking for fear I will see her in me and I don't ever want that hatered in me.